This article appeared first in the June issue of Pacific Northwest Golfer. Don't overthink it, was my sage advice, offered to the only person certain to ignore it in my group, and I was playing as a single. Don’t get caught up in the symbolism of every little ritual of this return to golf, I … [Read more...]
Essential recreation
I don't think I've seen a magpie, nor would I know one if I heard one. Are they native to my part of Grey Goatee Nation? No idea. Doesn't matter. My boys, the sporting gentlemen of the 3GA, were chattering on like Heckle and Jeckle, giggling by text message just after securing reservations for … [Read more...]
Thoughts on Dot’s
In any snack-shopping story, excess = success, and vice versa. We were at our local grocery emporium and came on a rack on an end cap with two bags left, just two, of Dot's Homestyle Pretzels. Did I take them both? No. That would've been mean. Directly kitty-corner across the store, oh joy, … [Read more...]
The street that time forgot
The dog shits more than he eats, I mean volume-wise, which is a puzzlement to me. I like all my bio/medical questions to be answered by Dr. Fauci these days, and while this one might be out of his particular area of specialty and off the subject at hand, I think I'll send it in to the next town hall … [Read more...]
There’s no next-best thing
We begin at the top when we start in to list the global sporting championships compromised by COVID-19. It's no joking matter, so we speak in hushed tones about postponement of the Bent Shaft Classic and lesser world events. It's not a tragedy. It's just a golf tournament. But what will we do with … [Read more...]
Pardon edition
I'm the Commissar, which is all you or anyone needs to know about My fat regal ass and My divine right to spew My rancid guts out on the heads of the innocent and grant pardon to My friends in the next gasp. There is only One Commissar, so therefore I write The Rules of Being the Commissar, … [Read more...]
Day 3: My pronouns
Been watching the Presidents Cup flow by on my television set with the sound down, a lot of the time. Our alternative soundtrack today is brought to you by Boz Scaggs's Out of the Blues. Favorite line, from "I've Just Got to Know": I think you want me for conveniency / If I'm wrong please tell me … [Read more...]
Day 2: And then another
The text came in from the brother in America's heartland: "Am I hallucinating or did we just make a putt?" We, baby, is the Americans, baby, and when Patrick Cantlay rolled one in from 14 feet on 18 to win a full point for the RW&B, we were on the way back. You can't have momentum until you … [Read more...]
Day 1: Goofy again at the Prez Cup
The Internationals' unprecedented 4-1 lead after Day One of the Presidents Cup should have been no surprise, given the severe competitive disadvantage faced by our boys. Really with the white pants? If cringing made a sound, you’d be hearing it from the famously astute Grey Goatee Fashion … [Read more...]
This week in golf and culture
Thanksgiving Day Nov. 28, 2019: On which we appreciate golf and its large place in our lives, notwithstanding that it rips our guts out and makes us drink and takes us away for hours and days from our loving families. We know what you’re thinking, and no, this day is for family time … … [Read more...]
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